Today is another sad day going to bed with tears in my eyes. Laying next to Jayden and feeling like he’s the only reason why I’m still here. I just have to keep praying to God that it will get better. I feel like I’ve lost everyone in my life. I have to build the… Continue reading
Feeling defeated and alone, maybe thinking that writing it down can help it go away My mom told me last week, “If you’re feeling down, just try and watch your favorite thing on YouTube, or watch a funny show to make you feel better, okay?” Sometimes this is sound advice, especially when you spend many… Continue reading Untitled Rambling May 31st
Of course my creative juices are most ripe when I have so much to do. These photos were taken this morning when we woke up, faces washed, messy hair, bare face for me, pajamas all day. My every day consists of making breakfast for Jayden & I, either oatmeal, yogurt + peanut butter, or scrambled… Continue reading Day in the life, Mommy & Jayden
What breathes life into you? Mine is: My son’s two tooth grin The rustling of sheets when he’s crawling towards me to wake me up The bing of a text message back when you have found another layer beneath rock bottom Words coming together when you have misplaced yourself in the pile of dirty laundry… Continue reading elixir
I feel so lucky for the life that I have. I woke up to Jayden crawling towards me with a big smile on his face. I slept on the floor of his room and opened my teary eyes distraught from the night before. I had a rough and emotional day the day before Mother's day,… Continue reading My first Mother’s Day
I identify strongly with the meme that says “That awkward moment when your everyday life is called ‘self quarantine’” and then there’s a picture of that distraught, guilty looking monkey. There is a weird sense of comfort, but also sadness, thinking about how a majority of Americans and the world for that matter, is experiencing… Continue reading Our Quarantine Routine
I’m a really terrible person to follow and my blogger dreams dwindle every yearly update I write. I’m a mama now. Jayden is 8 months old. I’d say that the last time I posted on here, I was getting ready to transition from maternity leave to going back to work, and that’s what got me.… Continue reading Hello 2020
sometimes peace finds me in the places that aren’t so quiet when my fingers are stretched, palms down, holding the weight of what I could have been. the sweat glistens. the music pulsates. when will I let go of the idea of me they implanted in my mind the one that finds no forgiveness in… Continue reading how peace finds me
It's going to be hard to write this without letting tears fall to my keyboard, but the happiest tears. The kind that bursts from a place of overwhelming love and gratitude, my heart so full that it overflows like steady streams outta my tear ducts. I've waited for this day for what had felt like… Continue reading The day you were born.
I write this with swollen fingers and my belly nearly resting on the table. Baby is the size of a winter melon, and I really don't even think I’ve seen a winter melon in real life. I haven't written a pregnancy update since my announcement and that's due to a lot of reasons. Firstly, I… Continue reading The final stretch.